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January 28, 2008

Mommy envy on The L Word

Hollandtaylor
Photo: Getty Images

I may be coming to terms with my lesbianism, but I still run on the time clock of a gay man. I failed to crank out an L word post last week (sorry, bad cold), but I'm redeeming myself this week by delivering a twofer special. Better late than never?

Regarding episode three, I have two words: Holland Taylor (above). I know I've been rambling on a lot lately about my divas, but this seasoned darling, who plays jailbird Helena's haughty mummy Peggy Peabody, has more clever sass in her pinkie than I'll ever have in a lifetime. Lady swooped on in to get my girlfriend Helena outta the slammer and unleashed some fantastic quips -- something these dramatic dames need a little more of, if you ask me.

My favorite lines from Madame Peabody: (1) "Our family doesn't go on trial. We generally go to Europe." And: "At least Paris when she was in the clink didn't get involved with some big, butch prison daddy dyke." I'm making a plea to Showtime: Can we please get more Peggy? And why in the world are the L Word folks sending Helena off with some cheap "I'm running away" plot twist? I feel robbed!

As for last night's show, is there really anything to talk about other than the last 60 seconds? I haven't shrilled like that since -- well, since Saturday night, when I dropped my drink in a mad rush to check the exit strategy of a cute boy at my local bar. Sure, Shane's little Shebar menage got me in a tizzy, but did we really think her sexless life would last longer than an episode? But I was shocked by Bette and Tina's closing lip-lock. It was soulful, sweet, and scandalous -- a much-needed monkey wrench for the season. Get your mops ready, Marys, cuz things are about to get real messy.

I'll leave you with this burning question: Who are we randy for in Bette's love life? Jodi or Tina?

-- JASON LAMPHIER

Previously > The L Word goes straight to Jason's thighs

Comments

If you want more Holland Taylor, you'll have to pry her out of the hands of the folks running 'Two and A Half Men', where she is equally entertaining--and, since I don't get Showtime, I'd rather see her liven things up on CBS...

Omg, Jason, I am SO glad that you're posting about the L Word. I still don't plan to watch it, but your impressions are hilariously awesome.

Good luck with your lesbianism!

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