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> Perhaps worried that we common folk have figured out she can't really sing and she can't really act and therefore she really has no specific or significant claim to her riches or fame, Jennifer Lopez apparently took matters into her owns hands in order to secure her air
of celebrity exclusivity remained fully intact. A source tells
MSNBC.com's The Scoop that on many occasions they witnessed J.Lo in the
first class lounge of an airport slipping through a door off limits to
other fliers. The passengers assumed that Lopez was whiling away her
time in an even more VIP room, only to find out she was sitting in a storage closet. "Give her credit for wanting to be left alone, but hiding in a storage closet? That's a little extreme," says the source. Sorry, here at Popnography, in situations like these, we don't give celebs credit, we award them a healthy heaping of ridicule. Though we have to admit the thought of Jenny standing in that tiny, dusty room before an audience of cleaning supplies -- all the little bottles of industrial solvents lined up in front of her eagerly awaiting a private a capella rendition of "If you had my love" -- does make us pretty chipper.
> Ed Westwick finds the rumors alleging his relationship with Chace Crawford exists in the realm of "more than just friends" ridiculous, but entertaining. "I just laugh them off," he tells People magazine, adding, "People who know me and Chace and the cast know that we are all great friends. And that's the extent of it all. Those things that go around are just amusing to us, really." But many gossipers aren't buying it -- Perez Hilton for example, who broke the original story about the two open-mouth kissing on the set of Gossip Girl -- and believe that Crawford's absence from Westwick's 21st birthday party last week was a calculated move to draw attention away from their burgeoning romance. We say regardless of what the real story is -- best friends or bed buddies or the next celebrity couple to wed in California -- we just hope, merely for the pleasure it produces for us to think about it, Ed gets his birthday spanking from Chace sometime soon.
> Brace yourselves! Britney Spears may perform on the 2008 MTV Video Music awards. "Everyone deserves a second or third chance, right?" Van Toffler, president of MTV Networks Music Group told the Associated Press. When pressed further and asked if he was joking, Toffler responded, "Sorta," before continuing, "Who knows?" Spears's performance on the 2007 VMAs was universally panned by critics and viewers -- some of whom asserted the sloppy lip synced number was surely the final nail in a coffin already filled with more nails than all the Home Depots in southern California combined. But like a zombie who won't let earthly concerns keep her down, or out of the paparazzi's flash bulbs, Britney soldiered on releasing a surprisingly decent album and shooting a shockingly competent guest spot on the sitcom How I Met Your Mother. Which proves that when it comes to Britney, the only thing you can be sure of is that there's nothing you can be sure of -- and that's exactly why we love her so much.
-- NOAH MICHELSON
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