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> Soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo was named the Ultimate Gay Icon in a recent poll. The Manchester United and Portugal winger beat out Kylie Minogue and Judy Garland for the top spot according to a poll of 3,000 gay men sponsored by GayGoldDiggers.Uk.com. The dating website "where affluent and golden people meet" (note: we have no idea what a "golden person" is either) told The Sun, "Ronaldo’s ripped body, slicked-back hair, shiny white teeth and
jewelery swung the votes his way. He looks like any gay man or woman's dream." But only if you're really into your men looking like charred barbecued chicken wings.
> As predicted Friday, Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi tied the knot during an intimate ceremony this weekend in Los Angeles. The wedding was attended by a mere 19 guests, including DeGeneres's mother Betty and de Rossi's mother, Margaret Rogers, who flew in from Australia for the occasion. People magazine reports that the couple exchanged handwritten vows, but otherwise little is known about the ceremony. Celebrity-Gossip.net has a few rogue, semi-focused paparazzi shots up on their site but all this secrecy has our Popnography Editrix demanding infinitely better coverage of gay events. Last night Shana launched into a mini-tirade in my direction, saying, "All I want is there to be as much info about their wedding as Pete [Wentz's] and Ashlee [Simpson's]! I knew their wedding reception playlist six hours after the frickin' wedding happened!" We feel your pain, Shana, and pray that it's only a matter of time before the YouTube videos of Betty DeGeneres macarena-ing are released.
> Socialite Courtenay Semel is claiming that she was Lindsay Lohan's first lesbian lover. The daughter of Yahoo! CEO Terry Semel says the two hooked up during the three months they lived together in the winter of 2007. "We were very passionate until [Lindsay's] fear of being found out drove us apart," Semel reportedly told a friend (who did the friendly thing and leaked the info to The News of the World). "At the time she was terrified her career would be over if she revealed
her sexual tendencies. But then Samantha [Ronson] came on to the scene and I was
dropped," she said. To make matters worse, apparently Courtenay still isn't over Linds. When the three women came face to face at the Crown Bar in Los Angeles late last month, Semel couldn't handle seeing Lindsay and Sam together. "Courtenay didn't even say hello to Lindsay," a source told the Star. "She was staring daggers at her all night while Lindsay and Sam cuddled in a booth. I guess there are still hurt feelings between them." And if that's not bad enough, Semel is reportedly dating Tila Tequila! Imagine going home to a reality TV disaster zone knowing that you'd once been with la Lohan. This is just the kind of equal opportunity tabloid mess we deserve.
-- NOAH MICHELSON
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