16 Years Without River Phoenix

Tonight at 1:51 AM, while the boys of the West Side are swinging to the pre-Halloween hum of electro beats and down in the village greased cowboys are pouring shots of sambuca to the lustful throngs of yuppies exploring their fruitful wild side, it will have been sixteen years since River Phoenix died outside of The Viper Room in Los Angeles.

Alas poor River, I didn't know you at all, but if crushes could span time and space and death and some poorly chosen methamphetamine, I feel we could have basked in the infinite stoned silence, understanding that truly, no one knew you at all. 

What so many fail to recognize is that River was a legend long before he became best known a cautionary tale of the potential tragedies awaiting young Hollywood stars. A dark beginning for anyone, he was born to two traveling hippies lured into the cult colony of The Children of God and spent his early years as the golden son of the mystical and child-molesting zealot group. His parents eventually packed him up along with and his siblings and fled back to California and as River entered school he was considered an oddity. With no friends of his own he spent his free time playing guitar with his family on the street. While other children had maps of Central Africa memorized, River wasn't sure who the president was. Instead, he found a home in the world of acting. On his first hit, Stand By Me, director Rob Reiner recalled choosing River because he thought he identified so much with his character Chris Chambers, a lonely and lively symbol of youth whose life is also cut short by a terrible tragedy. 

Too pure, too sensitive, we know River now as a true figure of duality, that blond stranger both young and old, who walked the tracks on both sides, who openly preached for a cleaner earth and carried no sense of rebellion, who cried at 15 years old when his girlfriend, Martha Plimpton, ordered lobster at a restaurant. "Heroin?" he once said, "I don't even eat meat." But drugs followed River at an early age. Pressured as the source of income for his parents and four younger siblings, by the time he was filming Gus Van Sant's My Own Private Idaho he was living in a house with real street hustlers for authenticity and going out with them at night to learn their trade.

When Johnny Depp owned The Viper Room (until 2004) the club was closed every October 31st to morn River's death. I'm not sure if the new owner upholds this tradition, but if there are any L.A. twinks out there, with your floppy blond hair, wistful ideals and joints in your pockets, and you want lay down a flower or a kind word, you sure would be my hero. You may not know who he is, but he made you.

I suppose the tradition for a gay-themed blog would be to include the famous Private Idaho clip, penned by River himself, who wanted to truly play out his character's longing romantic nature and wounded heart as he confesses his feelings by fireside -- but I'm not. I think River's best work is actually in the extremely under-rated Running on Empty for which he earned an Academy Award nomination. Like almost every film he did, it too reflects a part of his real life, telling the story of a family on the run from the police after their radical protest politics go too far. River's character in this film -- a gifted oddball at school, searching for normalcy and teenage love -- didn't seem to be a stretch from the reality of his life either.

The ending of the film (not shown here, you'll have to rent it yourself) is a real kicker, and I dare you not get stirred up as James Taylor's old classic pulls us into the credits. 

I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend, but I always thought that I'd see you again... 

-- ALEX WILBURN

Previously > Heath Ledger found dead

Comments

[Anonymous]

Oh, River, I miss you so much.

[Anonymous]

Great article. I'm glad to see that Out is honoring this sad occasion.

[Sally]

Well written article. Need to load up Netflix with River's backlist.

[Tess]

I love this article.

[Anonymous]

What a great article! River Phoenix is such an under-appreciated artist...

[Judith Linscott]

Your attachment to Phoenix comes across as light and lovely. A somehow very nostalgic piece. Really nice.